Chapter 2.10 – Nicky

04-28-18_12-28-04 PM“Cole…” said a familiar female voice from behind him.

04-28-18_1-19-55 PM.pngCole jumped, quickly putting distance between him and Laney and turned to face Nicky. The hurt look on her face said it all. He immediately felt guilty for not going to her earlier.  “There you are. I was looking for you. Did you talk to Kolby?” The white lie tasted ugly in his mouth.

04-28-18_1-21-53 PM.pngLaney stood up. “If ya’ll excuse me. It was nice chatting with you Cole,” she purred, “See you around school. Good luck with your venture.” Then she looked up at Nicky. “Later Nichole,” she added.

04-28-18_1-22-36 PM“What venture? What were you two talking about?” asked Nicky.

We wouldn’t have been talking at all if you would have stayed with me, thought Cole angrily. “Nothing,” said Cole trying to control his tone. “Please, sit down and talk to me.”

04-28-18_2-47-02 PM.pngWhen Nicky sat down, he continued. “What’s wrong with you? Even Berto noticed. You won’t even let me put my arm around you anymore. Ever since that night at Noah’s, I’ve been trying to give you space, but you just keep withdrawing more and more. It’s been four months Nicky! If you don’t trust me by now, I don’t know how else I can prove to you I won’t push you.  I really like you. I want to hold you close, to kiss you again.”

04-28-18_2-49-54 PM.pngNicky started to cry.

Fuck. Then a thought occurred to him. She had gone to find Kolby. What if she preferred girls? That made sense. “Oh my god. Nicky, are you…do you like girls…” he asked whispering the last word, “is that why you wanted to go talk to Kolby and don’t want to be with me?”

04-28-18_2-53-30 PM.pngNicky’s head shot up. “Oh Cole…do you mean am I a lesbian? No….” Then she looked really sad. “If only it were that easy. I’m not gay,” she said quietly, shaking her head. She took a deep breath and blew it out slowly before continuing in little more than a whisper. “When we were at Noah’s, I was fully intending to give myself to you. I knew that’s what you wanted and why we went upstairs. But I got scared. It would forever change things between us and I didn’t want that to happen.” She stopped and looked at her hands and tears fell silently. “Besides, it felt wrong.”

04-28-18_2-57-42 PM“Wrong?” Cole was furious. “So you fucking strung me along?” he asked, his voice rising with each word. Nicky flinched at his use of profanity, but he didn’t stop. The alcohol gave him courage to say what he should have said two months ago when things were getting worse between them instead of better. Plus, his brief moment with Laney made him feel desired, and Nicky didn’t – not anymore.  And now she says it felt wrong to be with him?

You didn’t want me, but made me think I did something to hurt you, that I did something wrong? Nicky. I….” Cole stopped. Was he going to say love? Obviously she didn’t want to be with him anymore, so he couldn’t voice the words that felt right. Then he looked around and saw that he had attracted attention with their argument. “I’m done,” he ground out, and got up to leave. She could find her own damn way home.

“No…Cole…don’t,” she pleaded.

04-28-18_3-10-11 PM.pngNicky was crying harder…shit. Well, how did she think she just made him feel? Instead of feeling sorry for her, he got even madder. “Stop it Nicky,” he said through clenched teeth, “everyone is looking.”

04-28-18_3-15-19 PMWhen she realized he was right, she got up and ran towards the stairs to go inside the house. Cole just stood there for a second not sure what to do. Fuck, he thought and let out a frustrated breath. He should just let her go, but he couldn’t. He began to feel remorseful for his sharp words. So, instead of leaving, he went after her. Surely they could work this out. He hoped.

04-28-18_3-44-53 PM.pngHe knocked on the bathroom door where he could hear her sobbing. “Nicky, I’m sorry. Let me in, please.”

“Go away,” came the voice from the other side of the door.

04-28-18_4-00-31 PM.pngHe wasn’t surprised she told him to leave, but he couldn’t. “Not going Nicky. We need to talk so let me in!” Cole heard the lock turn and breathed a sigh of relief. He walked through the unlocked door and gently closed and locked it behind him.

04-28-18_3-58-54 PM.pngNicky turned her back to him when he came in. “You don’t have to be sorry,” she said between sobs, “It’s me.”

Cole was still angry, but tried to temper it. “Let me be sure I understand. You don’t want to go out with me anymore?”

She slowly shook her no.

“Then why are YOU crying?”

04-28-18_4-03-59 PM.pngShe looked at his reflection in the mirror before answering. “Because . . . I love you . . . like a . . . brother,” her voice cracked on the last word and she started to cry again.

04-28-18_4-08-58 PM.pngCole was speechless. He stood there with his mouth open trying to sort out what she just told him.  A brother?  He felt like he had been punched in the gut. Then the pieces began to fall into place. He knew he probably loved Nicky, because it hurt so damn much that she was rejecting him. He would do anything for her. That’s why he stuck around so long. But did he also love her – like a sister? Not at all. He knew immediately it wasn’t like a sister. The thought of kissing his sister grossed him out, but the thought of kissing Nicky, it warmed him. But, if that’s how she thought about him, it was no wonder she distanced herself from him physically. Still, he was confused how she could have been so passionate with him one minute and then cold the next. It just didn’t make sense. He had ruined their friendship by pushing her to have sex with him, but he didn’t push…or did he?

04-28-18_4-11-07 PM.png“Cole? Do you hate me now?” Nicky asked so softly he almost didn’t hear her.

04-28-18_4-14-07 PM.pngHe looked at her and was heartbroken, close to tears himself. “No Nicky, I could never hate you. Truth is, I love you too….like a really special friend…I never wanted to hurt you or make you uncomfortable. I just wish you would have told me four months ago.”

04-28-18_4-16-17 PM“I, um, only realized what it was today. When I saw you and Laney together, the way she was flirting with you, I knew I couldn’t give you what you needed and she can. That’s when Kolby helped me realize…the…uh…brother thing.”

Wrong Nicky, thought Cole, You did give me what I needed. All I needed was you with me. And you liked being with me, hanging out, kissing me….before I messed up by pushing you for more. But now it was too late. He had hurt her.  Exactly what his dad told him not to do.

04-28-18_4-28-17 PM.png“Come here,” said Cole, holding out his arms. She fell into his embrace and he held her while she cried it out. It wrenched his gut. “It’s okay Nicky,” he whispered into her hair and he felt her shiver. “We can go back to being best friends.”

When she had pulled herself together, she pushed away from Cole and took a deep breath and let it out. “Why don’t you see if Laney wants to go to Noah’s with you,” she said softly,  “I will get a ride home with Kolby.  I really need to get out of here.”

Kolby. It made sense. Kolby was safe. He wasn’t. “Nicky…” he started to protest but she interrupted him.

04-28-18_4-19-00 PM“It’s okay. I promise,” she said softly and looked away. “You looked at Laney the same way she was looking at you. Maybe you two will hit it off.  Go on now.  I’m fine,” she said and sniffed as tears began to well up in her eyes again.

“Nicky…you’re not. I can’t just leave you. Are you sure this is what you want? Because I don’t.”

“Yes, I just need to be alone for a little while. Cole, you know that we have been over for a couple of months.  I just had to sort it out. I’m sorry I hurt you, I didn’t mean to.”

04-28-18_4-54-25 PM.png“Why don’t you stay. We can still have a good time, as friends.”

“Dammit Cole! Go!”

She never swore, so he knew she wasn’t going to give it up. “Fine. I’ll go find Kolby.”

“Thank you,” she said and he could see some of the tension leaving her body.

04-28-18_4-47-57 PM.pngBefore he left he turned to her one more time.”Nicky….I do love you, you know that, right?” he asked and softly kissed her on the cheek.

“Stop making me cry and go get Kolby.”

Cole groaned and slowly blew out a breath. Why was it so hard to walk away from her? Maybe because he felt guilty for hurting her.  And, he did love her, as a very good friend,  if not more. But he had to accept there was nothing he could do to change how she felt, and nothing would ever come of their relationship except friendship, unless that was also ruined. With an empty feeling inside, he turned and walked away from her to find Kolby.

Go to Chapter 2.11 >>>>>>>>>

Go back to Chapter 2.09

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45 thoughts on “Chapter 2.10 – Nicky

  1. Oh man..! 😕 When I read that she would go find Kolby in the previous chapter, I had the same thought as Cole, that maybe she liked girls. But it seems like Nicky just isn’t that into him.
    I hope Laney will be good for Cole – although I didn’t like the fact that she was kind of rude towards Nicky – she was still Cole’s girlfriend at the time after all!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Laney was a bit rude, but she is after Cole and can clearly see that he and Nicky aren’t cozying up. All’s fair in love and war – or so I’ve heard. 😕 She cares a lot about Cole, but couldn’t handle the direction that the relationship took. I hope they can remain friends. Break ups are always hard. 😢

      Liked by 2 people

  2. “You’re never gonna love me, so what’s the use?
    What’s the point in playing a game you’re gonna lose?
    What’s the point in saying you love me like a friend?
    What’s the point in saying it’s never gonna end?” Song lyrics…
    I feel so sorry for Cole. I wonder if Nicky has some other motives. It seems weird, because in the beginning she really enjoyed kissing him. Now, is she gonna find her gay best friend? LOL. It is so funny how some girls say it.

    Liked by 2 people

    • That song has me crying….my heart was breaking for both of them. This isn’t the last time we will see Nicky though. They have a 2 more years of high school awkwardness and playing grown up ahead of them and Nicky will be around. They are still young and inexperienced. Nicky and Cole were 16, maybe old for a first love. Cole just turned 17 a few weeks before the party.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Uh oh…FRIENDZONE…or more like brother-zone. Ha!

    Well, I wasn’t that into them as a couple anyway. They just didn’t seem to have the passion. And Cole seemed too in his head about her. I guess that’s the immaturity in him. He wanted love and couldn’t see the reality of the situation. But stringing the poor guy along for four months? FOUL, Nicky…I’d be mad if I was Cole. He took it well. Her explanation didn’t ring true to me. I mean, if you’re not feeling the attraction, you know it. But maybe she’s an avoider of all confrontation and that would make sense.

    So…now he’s got the green light for Laney! Bring on bachelorette number 2! Hee hee!

    Liked by 5 people

    • No kidding – bachelorette number 2 is in the house watching and waiting to pounce. And you picked up on her explanation not ringing true…🤭. But we won’t find out more for awhile why it sounded off. He definitely likes her and cares a great deal for her but he was still trying to work through his feelings and it was getting to him. He wanted intimacy and she cut him off.
      Maybe Laney will give him what Nicky thinks he wants. 😜

      Like

  4. I want to roll my eyes. You don’t kiss a brother, Chrissy. Not the way you did, with your tongue saying hello to his tonsils. You mislead him. I would have understood if he pushed you, but he didn’t. You brought this on yourself, you confused little girl. Cole is a saint to still want to be friends with you. Many guys would just walk away at this moment.
    Time to move on, Cole. Next girl, please.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yep….you picked up on that too. A little more going on that she won’t say. He was confused too. But what can you do? And Laney is right there ready to pick up the pieces…we will see on Friday how it plays out with Laney and if Cole will succumb to her charms, or not.

      Like

  5. Pingback: Chapter 2.09 – Laney | New Beginnings

  6. Is she an asexual? If so , I can understand why she’s confused! It’s often an invisible group , especially for teens, and an identity that doesn’t get a lot of support or inclusion. Lots of ace – phobia around !

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s interesting that you brought that up. Someone on the forums suggested that as well. We will see what her real reason was for breaking up with Cole a bit later. It could be that or a number of other reasons too.

      Like

  7. Awe, poor Cole. His first heartbreak. 😦
    I hope he and Nicky can still be friends. It might take some time, but I think that they can get back to that. As others were saying, I don’t think that Nicky was 100% truthful to Cole. There has to be more there, and it most likely has something to do with what she was talking to Kolby about.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Oh no, Cole! You’ve been friendzoned! :O :O :O Dude, what a bummer. I was really shipping them. But I can see where she is coming from. I wonder if Laney will pounce now that they officially broken up?

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Poor Cole! 😥 I am so skeptical of Nicky’s excuses here. She certainly didn’t seem to feel brotherly toward him when they were making out! Hahaha. My heart breaks for Cole right now. Not a great way for your first relationship to end 😥 But at least they seem to be on decent terms…

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I was thinking the same as CathyTea. That she likes Cole but that isn’t something she wants. If it’s true, maybe she feels like she can’t make Cole happy… Plus, it would make sense on why it took so long to figure out. In my experience, it can take a while to figure out in it’s entirety but when you know, you know. 🙂

    Could be something else though.
    Also, hopefully Laney plays nice…

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Excellent chapter as always. I ca identify with both of them, I think most people can. We have all been on both sides of the situation at some time or another. Like Cole however I can’t quiet let go of Nicky. It seems to me there is something there but Nicky just isn’t ready. Maybe i’ts just due to the way sims look, but I think Laney might be a bit of a Oedipus Complex kinda thing, which would make sense due to Cole’s “Mother situation”, but is it me or does Laney resemble Sophia quiet of bit?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, I think we’ve all been there. And it’s interesting that he isn’t ready to let go of Nicky quite yet. But he hasn’t truly experienced Laney yet either. Nicky and Cole will have one more convo to try and clear the air.

      Laney does resemble Sofia. Lol…but hopefully he isn’t fixated on that. Maybe in some ways that could be true though, because he totally idolizes the relationship his parents have with each other and wants the same thing for himself. He totally fantasized about that with Nicky. Should he get together with – okay when he gets together with Laney – we all know it’s coming right – he will likely do the same. 😂But very interesting observation.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Pingback: Chapter 2.11 – Bad Dancer | New Beginnings

  13. ”The thought of kissing his sister grossed him out” Way to blew a hole to the name of my ship…Anyway, back on the actual story, it finally makes sense to why Nicky did not want to date Cole anymore…maybe she was confused about her feelings, and things just seem…good, i guess….I hope Cole isn’t affected by this, as, this cleary is not like his mother’s and father’s situation, and he won’t be ( for now) with the person he loves.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes…sorry about the ship damage there! Haha! I loved that ship name by the way. But it’s damaged, but is it sunk forever? Nicky is very confused about her feelings and she put the brakes on too hard maybe…

      Liked by 1 person

  14. So Nickys feelings for Cole are as a brother. It took her 4 months to realize it. thats why it is so important NOT to go steady in your teen years… You find out what your feelings are for different people personalities etc…via dating or the selection process.
    It takes time and as you progress in your teen years you may find that your feelings change….
    Reading on….

    Liked by 1 person

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