Chapter 3.17 – Prison Mama

Ryan felt hot tears begin to form behind his eyes as he watched the woman, who he now knew for certain was their mother,  practically crumple to the ground when she saw them.

The male guard rushed over to see what was going on. “Everything okay?” he asked the female guard. She looked at her prisoner and their mother nodded. “Okay,” he said and pointed at Avery.  “You know the rules.”

Avery quickly put her hands in the air as she nodded her affirmation.  Ryan took a deep breath in an effort to maintain his own composure while he watched the exchange. Reagan was squeezing his hand, which made it doubly hard.  He knew he had to stay strong for her because she was just as unnerved as he was. Ryan wasn’t sure exactly what he had expected, but this wasn’t it.

Finally satisfied her prisoner was okay, the guard motioned for Avery to take a seat at the bench across from them.  She sat down, her head down, unable to meet their gaze. Ryan looked at his sister and tears were rolling down her face and it was like someone punched him in the gut.

“Mama?” she squeaked out, which made Avery finally lift her head to look at them.

Avery nodded her head. “My babies,” she whispered and began to cry again. “I never expected to see you again. How?” She barely managed to choke out the words.

“Mama!” said Reagan on a sob and started to reach across the table. The guard cleared his throat loudly causing Reagan to inhale sharply and jump back.

“It’s okay baby,” said Avery, her voice barely above a whisper. She took a cleansing breath before speaking again. “I just can’t believe you are actually here.  Reagan, you’re beautiful, and all grown up. God, you look so much like your father.” She smiled a little before going on. “But, I always knew you would. God I’ve missed you two so much. I think about you all the time.”

Then she directed her attention to Ryan. “And you. Oh my god Ryan. You were just scrawny little guy and look at you now. You are so handsome and strong. You must work out. I’m sure you have to fight off the girls.” Tears were once again sparkling in his mother’s eyes.

Ryan had tried to imagine what he would say to her when he finally saw her face to face. In fact he thought he might even tell her to go to fucking hell for what she had put them through.  That had worried him, because Rea was so sure their mother loved them, and she would have been hurt even more if he’d had to say those words to her. But she seemed extremely moved to see them and it confused him. Where was the evil bitch that their father had made her out to be? Why hadn’t they been allowed to see her? It suddenly seemed wrong that they’d been kept away for eight years. 

Avery sighed deeply when neither of them spoke. “I know this is awkward. But you have no idea how much it means to me that you are here. But I don’t understand. How? Why?”

Reagan spoke before Ryan could form any words. “I’ve missed you too Mama, I think about you all the time. Why didn’t you call?”

“Oh Reagan. It’s not that simple,” explained their mother, “I was a mess when I got here. Very bitter. I blamed your father. Hated him, in fact, for putting me in here. And I knew, he hated me too. So I gave up my rights to you. I couldn’t fight it from here.” She put here head in her hands and choked out a sob before she could calm herself enough to continue. “I’m really sorry I did that. But I knew I couldn’t be a mother to you from here and I had lost all hope.”

Ryan watched her getting angry. How could someone just give up their children? And her words were destroying Reagan. “I think we need to leave Reagan.”

Avery looked up panicked. “No Ryan,” she said quickly, “Please.  Please don’t go.” She sounded desperate and began to wring her hands. “I’ve dreamed of this moment for years. You came this far for a reason. Stay and hear me out.”

She paused and when they didn’t make a move to leave, she continued. “I didn’t orchestrate what happened to Ami. All I’m really guilty of is cheating. I don’t even know what happened  – – to him.  I’m not proud of what I did, but I think, if things had been different, your father and I, we maybe could have worked it out. I don’t hate Cole anymore. He was hurt badly and needed to blame me, and rightly so. When I look at the two of you now, I know it was right to let him have you. He did good all alone.”

“He’s not all alone,” said Reagan bitterly.

“Oh?” said Avery and arched her eyebrow briefly. “Well, I’m sure he must have started to date again. We are divorced sweetheart.” Avery looked at the book laying in front of Reagan. “What’s that?” she asked softly.

Ryan wanted out of there, but there was no way his sister was leaving. And truthfully, he was also beginning to soften. He hadn’t expected his mother to be repentant. He expected a bitter hateful version of her. He wasn’t sure what to think anymore. So he watched as Reagan began to talk about the pictures she had lovingly put into the book.

“Who’s the pretty blonde?” asked Avery.

Ryan remembered back to the time before they found out Taylor was their sister. She and Reagan were joined at the hip. So it was hard to find any pictures of them, until the last couple of years, without Taylor, Dannie and even baby Connie in them.

“She’s our half sister,” said Ryan emotionless.

Avery looked curiously in his direction. “But how?” she asked, “She’s the same age as you two.”

Ryan went on to explain that Taylor was in fact nearly two years older than them and they now had another half sister, Taylor’s sister, that was now six.

Avery thought for a minute. “She was the woman with Cole at the trial….the football player’s wife.” She said it more to herself than to them.

“I don’t know,” said Ryan, “She was married to a football player. So I guess so. I didn’t know she was at the trial.”

“Yes. Of course not. I’m sorry Ryan. It’s just, I don’t talk to anyone – on the outside.”

Reagan pushed the album back across the table to her mother,  “You can keep this. I made it for you,” she said.

“Thank you,” said Avery and tears lit up her eyes again.

“Um…Ryan plays basketball,” said Reagan, “The scouts were there for his game and talked to the coach. He might get a scholarship.” Reagan smiled and Ryan was warmed at the pride in her voice.

He wanted to repay the kindness. “Reagan is going to work for Ami this summer. Ami said she has an eye for color.”

Reagan blushed. “She said I took after you, with a flair for color and design.”

“Really?” asked their mother, looking shocked.

“She said you were really good at it,” replied Reagan.

“I am so proud of you both,” said their mother and smiled for the first time since she sat down. “And Reagan, thank you so much for this. When I get lonely, I can look through it and it will remind that this day was real. I love you both so very much.”

“Mama….” said Reagan, and scrunched up her face, “can we come see you again?”

“Of course. I would love that. It would make my remaining time go by so much faster knowing I have something to look forward to.”

Ryan spoke up not wanting his sister or his mother to get their hopes up. “I’m not sure when we can come again. You see, Dad doesn’t know we’re here.”

“Yeah,” chimed in Reagan bitterly, “he’s in Paris with his other family.”

“They went because Taylor is going to go to school there,” explained Ryan quickly, “And, Rea, you could’ve gone.”

“Paris? As in France?” asked Avery.

Reagan nodded. “Sorry. He’s right,” she said, “It’s just so hard to see Daddy be proud of Taylor, and disappointed with me.”

“Oh honey, you are beautiful and talented. How could he possibly be disappointed?”

“Because, he and Dannie, Taylor and Connie are a real family. We are just step kids now,” said Reagan.

“Taylor’s a kiss up,” grumbled Ryan.

“I’m sorry you two are having to deal with that,” said Avery, sadly. “You wouldn’t have had to if weren’t for my bad decisions.  I’m so very sorry.”

“If Daddy was nicer to you, all of this wouldn’t have even happened,” complained Reagan.

“Honey, it’s not all his fault. I was dealing with depression and didn’t know it.  But, I got help here. Do you know, you are the only visitors I’ve ever had.”

“Ryan, we have to come back,” said Reagan, desperation in her voice.

“I don’t know when or how,” replied Ryan trying his best to prepare Reagan for the fact they may not be able to see their mother again for quite some time. “You know Dad probably won’t allow it.”

“He’ll have to! We’ll just tell him!” said Reagan her voice beginning to carry across the room.

“Rea, be quiet,” said Ryan, “they’ll make us leave.”

“Reagan, it’s okay sweetheart,” said Avery trying to calm her down. “Don’t tell him. Ryan’s right. I doubt he’d sanction a visit to see me. You graduate in another year. When you do, if you still want to see me, you can come then.” She laughed bitterly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Oh Mama …. I don’t want you to have to have to stay here,” said Reagan and dissolved into tears.

Avery looked at Reagan helplessly.  “Shhh. It’s okay. Please, don’t be sad. You two coming to see me has given me new hope. It gives me something to look forward to when I do get out. Then we can see each other and get to know one another again. I love you both so much, and I’m so very proud of you. It took a lot of courage to come here. So, don’t ever let your father make you think you are a disappointment. You aren’t.”

Just then the female guard walked over followed by the woman that brought them in earlier. “Avery, your time is up,” said the guard.

As soon as she said that Reagan cried out, “No! Mama!”

The guard smiled kindly at Reagan. “Miss, clam down. You can come back later. I’ll give you a minute to say goodbye. You can give her a hug before I take her back.”

“Thank you,” said Avery and stood up.  She drew both of her children into her arms. “I love you both. Be strong. We’ll get to see each other again. Thank you for the album, and most of all, for coming.”

“We’ll call,” promised Ryan as they took Avery away, desperate to say something to calm both his sobbing mother and sister.  Ryan now had to hold his sister up, much as the guard had to hold his mother up when she first saw them.  Damn his mother or damn his dad. He didn’t know who to blame for his sister’s misery. And his too, for that matter. He knew right then, he would never, ever have kids.

Ryan waited until the steel doors closed and their mother was no longer in sight before he urged Reagan to move. “Come on Rea, we gotta go. You heard Mom. You need to be strong.”  He put his arm around her and guided her out as they followed the woman that initially brought them down.

Go to Chapter 3.18>>>>>

Go back to Chapter 3.16

Here is a link to the Prison on the Gallery –  It is CC free by FC781  

64 thoughts on “Chapter 3.17 – Prison Mama

  1. I’m taking everything Avery says with a grain of salt. Homegirl hasn’t had to do much of her trademark scheming before this, save to get commissary bucks or shank someone I suppose. 😛

    Liked by 4 people

    • Ha! Not much scheming to be done in prison. I’m sure it was probably emotional to see her kids and realize life has gone on outside of the big house. And then, perhaps she has turned over a new leaf and is a model prisoner….and wants to make up for her bad decisions. I suppose only time will tell. 🤷‍♀️

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Yesssssssss there she is 😈

    As much as I want to believe she’s changed, I’m not buying this yet. I need to see more before I’m willing to believe that she’s really changed!

    My heart was breaking for the twins as they finally got this chance to talk to their mother, I just worry that they’re going to let their emotions blind them to being cautious around her. Look what you did, Daddy Murdick! Pushed your kids right into this potential mess.

    For their sakes, I hope she’s sincere and really has changed, but for now I will remain highly skeptical until I’ve seen more interactions (assuming more interactions are actually a good idea… 😂 damn you for making it so hard to tell! 😂)

    Awesome chapter and worth the wait! ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes! Here she is…in her fashionable new attire. I’ve no doubt everyone will be skeptical. She hasn’t done anything really to prove she’s changed and wants to right the wrongs she’s done other than her words.

      And, yes…the twins were so blinded by their emotions. Ryan not as much at first, but he did eventually begin to believe that she really was being truthful. It was hard and my heart was breaking to imagining how they must feel seeing their mother locked up. Daddy Murdick has no one but himself to blame should this go sideways. But then, they mentioned before they wanted to see her and he didn’t. Things may have been different if he’d done it when they originally voiced that concern. She may not have had time to do any soul searching and would have been bitter and angry instead of apologetic and contrite.

      I hope she is telling the truth and she truly does care about them. I’m sure everyone will be skeptical and rightly so. She will have to work hard to convince anyone else other than the twins that she is a changed woman. Not sure when they’ll actually see her again since telling Daddy Murdick won’t happen.

      Thanks! 😊 I’ve been looking forward to this chapter since Avery went to prison. And also look forward to her eventual release. 😇😇😇 As a changed woman!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh, Avery is acting so different. I am not sure what to think, but then again, she seemed truly moved… Wow, it’s weird seeing her without make up and fancy dresses. So hard to recognize after the Avery I remember from Cole’s gen! The twins must be so conflicted, too. I noticed how you practically said it all through Ryan’s eyes. It was a nice change to usually getting to know Reagan’s point of view. We’ll see about him not having kids… My Math teacher once that when she was our age, she said she didn’t want kids, too, and that she now has three! Things change.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Eight years in Prison and a bit of therapy might make one act different. I’ve no doubt she was truly moved. And yes, she looked so different with no makeup and her trademark fancy dresses. She was humbled for sure. And she aged a bit too. I know they are upset. It’s got to be hard to see your mother like that, especially since Reagan has been putting her on a pedestal lately.

      I am glad you liked seeing a Ryan POV. I wanted to get a little more into his head since everything has been seen from Reagan’s perspective. We already pretty much know what she’s thinking just from her reaction.

      And kids, yes, he has no desire for kids right now. I wonder if he will change as he matures. Hmmm…

      Liked by 1 person

    • Hi! Welcome to the comment section! 😊 Another doubter! I’m sure you are not alone in your assessment. But people can change…see the error of their ways and all. Hopefully for the sake of the twins, she has indeed changed. 😇

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    • Thanks Froots! 😊😊😊 It could be real especially if you squint really hard! I hope for the twins sale she has turned over a new leaf and was genuinely happy to see them. After eight years and seeing how much they’d grown, it makes you realize how much life you’ve missed….so….maybe….

      Liked by 2 people

  4. She could be playing them to get back at Cole, but somehow I don’t think so. I believe the prison changed her. It’s such a different world and it leaves a mark. It’s the rock bottom.
    Cole is going to flip if he finds out, but he can’t stop Rea from writing letters to her mom.
    Great chapter!

    Liked by 4 people

  5. I’m going to stay firmly on the fence about whether or not Avery has changed. I think it’s weird for her to suddenly be all maternal, but then all the hard and annoying bits of raising them are over and now she can just bask in the loving affection of the daughter she treated like dirt… Okay, so I may have a toe on the side of ‘Avery is horrible’, but mostly I’m on the fence. I’ll wait and see what happens. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Avery…does a snake ever change their fangs? Nope.

    Avery’s tears are real, no doubt, but they’re tears of loss…for herself. That’s who Avery cares about most of all. When she gets out, she’s going to be a snake in their sweet garden. 🐍 I’m kind of looking forward to that. 😈

    She gave up rights to them because she didn’t want them in the first place. And now if she does have a relationship with them, it’ll only be to seek revenge on Cole. Oh…she’s good…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Haha. Firmly in the camp of snake! I’m sure her tears are real. Seeing two beautiful children that she didn’t want anything to do with sitting there wanting to have a relationship has to be devastating. She knows she was awful and now wants to make amends…. but is there more motivation than that? Time will tell. 😇😈😇??????

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Reagan and Ryan have made a decision when they found out that Taylor was their half sister to cut Cole, Dannie, and Taylor out of their lives. It was a very bad decision and they have not changed their decision yet. We have seen what happened to Reagan and her sneaking around with Archer. Cole had to find out about Archer and his past from the Principal when Archer fought with Ryan in school. Due to Reagan shutting Cole and the rest of the family out, her sneaky behavior and lies to Cole hiding her relationship with Archer, Naturally there is a loss of trust, Cole would show his disappointment with Reagan over shutting the family out, lying, hiding her actions with Archer. It would probaby grate Cole even more to see this Avery kind of behavior from Reagan. It makes alot of sense that Cole would put his foot down and forbid Reagan to see Archer again at her young age. I don’t call this Murdick behavior at all. And Cole does listen to Dannie on how to handle this.
    Reagan, in an Avery maneuver, realized she will need to interact with “Murdick” in order to have any kind of life and still cut the trio out of her life would be to give some facts ie daing, boys to the “Murdick” and be able to date etc. I feel Cole was reasonable cutting her some slack and letting her go.
    Now the twins bad decision cutting the trio out of their lives lead them to turn down a trip to Paris, try to have a wild party with alcohol, and to go see their jailbird Mother. This is
    going to further reduce the fragile trust Cole has in the twins. They are free to make a bad decision but they are not free from the consequences of their bad decision.
    It would have been so much better if the twins changed their decision and included the trio in their life. If Reagan had been above board in the beginning Cole may have let Archer see Reagan how be it in a chaperoned way and due to interaction and trust let Reagon continue to see Archer. The twins could have a great friend in Taylor. I am sure it broke Taylors heart when the twins shut her out of their life and she had to live with it, how be it rejected after being childhood friends with for so long with Reagan. if the twins had spoken up re wanting to see Avery, it is very possible Cole would have let them see her.
    Regarding Avery: I am not sure if Avery’s sentence excluded the possibility of Parole. If it didn’t it is very telling that she has not been paroled for good behavior yet. Yes, it is possible that Avery has changed, but I doubt it if she has not been paroled yet. Depends on her sentence. Avery has had no outside support from her non existant family to help motivate her to change.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Things could have been much different if Reagan and Ryan had embraced Taylor rather than being jealous and resentful. They just lost their trust in the one parent they always trusted. Sadly, things got out of control with Archer which caused all sorts of bad decisions on both parts. Then Reagan began to fantasize that their mother was maybe a victim as well. And would make everything right again in the midst of Cole overreacting.

      The loss of trust on both sides is sad. I hope that Avery has changed and if not maybe the visit from the twins will provide that incentive. And maybe Ami can become a confidant for Reagan in the mean time.

      Taylor was no doubt hurt by their distancing themselves.

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  8. I don’t buy Avery’s tears. She is too much of a schemer and she knows how to use her tears and emotions to manipulate people, she did it with Cole and she is now doing it with her kids. She may have not directly orchestrated things with Ami, but she is not innocent. I don’t trust her.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Well, let’s see, seems to me, the twins gave Avery a lot of info there. Now, Avery can use that info to encourage a larger gap between the twins and the rest of the family. Reagan’s already bought Avery’s side of the story, hook, line and sinker. Ryan, I think, is not far behind. I’m not ready to believe that sneaky Avery is on the up and up here with her repentance. She was a true schemer. Yes, people can change and I suppose prison is a good place to think about the things you’ve done. But I think Avery looks at herself as a victim. I don’t know what to expect, but I wish the twins hadn’t fed her so much information about the trouble in their family.

    Liked by 1 person

    • You noticed! They did give her a lot of information she didn’t previously have! I hope she isn’t still viewing herself the victim but it’s exactly how she presented herself to them as if her crime wasn’t that bad. Although she did say it was wrong. Yes. Reagan wanted to believe she wasn’t bad from the start and Ryan is having a hard time not believing her. Let’s just hope she has reflected and has decided to change and do better.

      Liked by 1 person

        • Yes. They made perfect sense! The twins had no reason to hold back. They finally had someone that wanted to hear what they had to say. Or so they think…so sad they just keep pushing everyone else away because Cole and Dannie want to be there…

          Liked by 1 person

          • That’s true. I think the twins acted in the emotion of the moment and kept it going because of jealousy. I also think Cole could have handled the whole thing better by listening to them and reassuring them when it all blew up. I’m holding out hope they can heal from this. 🙂 But now, Avery is in the mix and she’s armed with information she shouldn’t have because the twins finally found someone to listen to them. UGH. lol 😀 I’m loving it, btw.

            Liked by 1 person

  10. I’m so sorry I’m so late again! :O
    I had the weirdest feeling watching Avery act like that. It’s true that with so much time on her hands she was definitely able to think things through, but then again, I don’t know… she never really was the sensitive type, and even less when it came to her kids.
    As much as I – still – hate her, at least I hope her feelings are genuine, so that the twins won’t be in for yet another disappointment!
    Oh, and I bet daddy Cole won’t like this if he ever finds out – but I kinda look forward to that development, lmao! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Isn’t this exactly the Avery we know – trying to worm her way into the good spots by any means possible. I doubt she’ll have changed so much that she’s not willing to use her kids’ misfortune to get something good and nice for herself…

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Pingback: Chapter 3.18 – Grandma’s House | New Beginnings

  13. Pingback: Chapter 3.16 – Christmas Break | New Beginnings

  14. So, it was depression after all. Sounds reasonable enough after seeing the change in Avery. I’m glad she could find help.
    I’m not sure if she has realized what she missed when shoving her kids away in earlier years or if she’s being manipulative again. Still a little concerned.

    Liked by 1 person

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