Chapter 4.11 – Compromises

Taysia sat in her kitchen drinking coffee and mulling over her and Ryan’s ‘love’ affair. After their date last night, Taysia knew she had it bad for Ryan. Who was she kidding? She knew before their date that she had fallen in love with the man. She couldn’t help it. Ryan was gorgeous, charming, a successful businessman, an amazing lover. But what impressed her most was his love of family.  She’d seen plenty of fathers from both intact and split families that thought their role was simply to provide financial support and left all the responsibility for raising their children to the mother.

Ryan was everything she could ever have wanted in a life partner – except he didn’t take very well to being told no and acted on impulse instead of thinking things through, living in the moment.  Two things which drove her crazy.  Granted, her reasons for hiding their relationship were selfish and probably unfounded.  Which drove him crazy.

Once sweet Tyler had discovered they were more than just friends, she simply got nervous. Her private life would no longer be private. Things suddenly got too complicated and out of control for her liking. She felt like she had no choice but to slow them down in order to regain some semblance of control over her life.

Taysia wasn’t kidding when she ordered tea instead of wine last night.  Two glasses and she would’ve invited him inside when he took her home. She wouldn’t allow him to kiss her either, because she knew exactly where that would lead as well. 

Understandably Ryan was confused. He was right, they were adults and if they wanted to have a relationship, then they should be able to. But she was afraid of getting a reputation as a gold digger or worse a woman with loose moral standards. Some already thought she was ‘too young and inexperienced’ to be a middle school principal.  She had worked extremely hard to prove she was qualified. If she was seen chasing after Ryan Murdock, a recent divorcee and very eligible bachelor, it might solidify their opinion and cause more concern for ability to do her job. She reasoned it could negatively affect Tyler as well.

To make matters even more confusing for her, she wasn’t entirely sure where she stood with Ryan. He said she ‘meant the world’ to him. Maybe he was just grateful to her for helping Tyler. He hadn’t said he loved her, although she had to admit, he acted like he might. But those words were never spoken. If he wasn’t as invested in her as she was in him, she’d be devastated. Her own self doubt and insecurities from her childhood came roaring back and prevented her from telling him her true feelings.

She had been extremely jealous when Ms. Dean came over to their table last night. She tried to laugh it off, but inside she wanted to claw the woman’s eyes out. And poor Ryan, it seemed he was truly clueless about what the Murdock name meant in their small community.  Even Taysia had known who The Murdocks were. Now her name was inextricably linked with his. What did she think would happen? Dating someone high profile would certainly not go unnoticed.

Now that they were outed as a couple, she didn’t know what to do.  Keeping Ryan at arm’s length the past several months had been as difficult for her as it apparently has been for him, leading to their confrontation at his gym.  

But, she’d been so angry at the way he tried to coerce her into his office that day, she couldn’t think straight and had to leave instead of staying and talking it out like he wanted.

So, when he asked her out later in the week, she felt like she had to go to clear the air. And damn him, he held her hand the entire way there making her heart race. When he parked and let go, her hand felt empty.  She badly wanted to take it back but didn’t dare.  She was hopelessly in love with him and terrified of him at the same time.

Maybe Ms. Dean seeing them together was the wake up call she needed to force her to see how ridiculous she was behaving.  She was surprised Ryan hadn’t dumped her already.  The mere fact he was still around after the way she treated him must mean something. But how much longer would he put up with it?  Did she really want to risk losing the man she loved for fear of what others might say?

She decided to call him, before she lost her nerve, and ask him to come to her house. It was time for an honest and open discussion about their relationship. She hadn’t been exactly honest with him or herself for that matter.  They’d been seeing each other for nearly a year and she knew it couldn’t continue it like it was.  They were both hurting. So either they were together with the hopes for the future or they would break it off.

With shaking hands, she picked up the phone and called Ryan.

“Miss me?” he teased when he answered his phone.

Even now, he made her smile. “Yes, I do,” she admitted. “But that’s not why I called. We need to talk. But not on the phone.”

“Are you breaking up?” he asked. The playfulness eagerness in his voice now gone, replaced by anger.

She couldn’t answer. Maybe, she thought but wouldn’t say that over the phone. “Can you just come over, please, so we can talk in person.”

“You can’t be pregnant,” he said. His sarcasm was clear and his tone still harsh. “So what is it that I have to be there in person to hear besides you’re breaking up? Although I have to admire you for not doing it over the phone or via text.”

She was near tears at the hurt in his voice. He wasn’t going to make this easy, “Please, stop guessing. And just let me know when you can be here.”

“Fine, I’ll be there in an hour,” he said and disconnected the call.

Taysia let out the breath she’d been holding as she laid her head on the table and let a few tears escape.  She was worried more now than before.  Ryan seemed ready to believe the worst. She knew it was her fault he thought that way. And this might be the end of their relationship.

After a few minutes, she dragged herself up and went to take a quick shower, change her clothes and brush her teeth.  She needed to keep busy while she waited for Ryan to arrive or she would sit there and imagine all that would go wrong.

She had just put on a fresh pot of coffee when the doorbell rang, making her jump. She took a deep breath and went to answer the door.

Even angry, Ryan took her breath.  But of course he’s angry, she thought, he thinks I’m breaking up with him when that’s the last thing I want.  “Come in,” she said and tried to smile but she was so nervous it probably looked more like a sneer. “I just put on a fresh pot of coffee.”

“Smells good,” he mumbled, and followed her into the kitchen.

She poured two cups and handed one to him. She realized she knew how he took his coffee. They knew some things about each other but not nearly enough – because she’d been keeping him at arm’s length.  He sat down at the dining table and she joined him.

“So, wanna tell me what was so important that you couldn’t tell me on the phone?” he asked getting straight to the point.

“It’s complicated Ryan. But I’ll try.  Ever since last night’s date, I’ve been thinking about us – a lot. I hope you don’t hate me for how I’ve acted these past few months. It’s just that I’ve realized a few things about myself since I met you.  I’m sort of a control freak.” She visibly winced at those words and felt the need to explain. “I worked single minded for years to have this job, to the exclusion of all else in my life. It’s very important to me…”

“I knew it! This is a fucking break up speech!” said Ryan angrily. “Save your justifications and just say it. Rip off the band-aid so I can move on.” He scooted back his chair and stood up to leave.

“No Ryan! Don’t go. It’s not,” she said quickly, “I promise, I don’t want to break up.”

“Then what the fuck is this?” he asked still standing over her.

Taysia’s stomach was in knots. This wasn’t the way she thought this would go and now she was backed into a corner.  “I’m in love with you,” she blurted out. The words tumbled out on their own and she immediately wished she could take them back. “You don’t have to say it back. I understand. You just got divorced and committing again could be scary.”  When he didn’t say anything she had to fill the silence.  “I shouldn’t have said it.  Just forget it, please, okay?”

Ryan slowly sat down and she breathed a little easier. He didn’t run, not yet anyway. “Then why Taysia?” he asked the confusion on his face clear, “why push me away?”

“Like I said, I’m a control freak, I need things orderly and controlled. Our love affair has been anything but, and I don’t know how to deal with that. The harder you pushed for more, the harder I pushed back. Ryan, you’re a Murdock and I’m a nobody with only my job to define me. My job is my identity.”

Ryan didn’t comment so she continued. “I knew I was playing with fire when I came into the gym that day, but I’ve never felt anything for anyone else like I did when I was with you. And it seemed to me like you felt it too. But you were too much of a gentleman to make a move, so I did. That was probably the most impulsive thing I’ve ever done in my entire life, and well, it was exhilarating.” She began to smile as she remembered that day and the following night. “You made me feel beautiful, sexy and alive. Not like a stuffy principal. And somewhere along the way, I fell madly in love with you.”

Taysia felt Ryan’s hand on hers. She was shaking and when he touched her warmth spread throughout her body calming her.  That one small gesture let her know he wasn’t leaving.

Then he chuckled, surprising her. “I’ve been called a lot of things in my day, but gentleman was never among them. Sweet Taysia, I want you to listen to me now. You are the sum of your parts. Being an excellent principal is just a piece of what defines you. And probably the smallest piece. You’re smart, kind, empathetic, absolutely beautiful and fun loving. You’re an amazing woman. And, for the record Taysia, sweetheart, I love you too. I’m sorry I didn’t say it before now. I was afraid you would think I was trying to trap you. I’ve known for awhile, but I convinced myself you were getting ready to dump my ass, so I was trying to protect myself. Instead, I only hurt you. For that, I’m sorry.”

He said he loved her and it wasn’t after sex. In fact they hadn’t even kissed in several months. That’s why he hadn’t left her, because he really did care. But there was still the issue of compatibility. She took a deep breath before saying what was on her mind.  “Ryan, as a couple, we’re still a mess. I’m paranoid and controlling. You see things as black or white and live in the moment. Do you think we can overcome our differences enough to be open and honest with each other.  If we don’t, even though we love each other, I’m not sure we can make it work.”

“A compromise then?” he suggested. “You try to let go a little and I’ll be more cognizant of what I want and how I go about it?”

Taysia breathed a sigh of relief. “That sounds like a plan. And we need to be able to call each other out on it without the other getting upset. I know it’s going to be hard, but as long as we’re honest and not being mean and spiteful.”

“Sounds reasonable,” he said smiling. He paused and looked at his surroundings as if he hadn’t seen them before then looked at her. “Taysia, you know, this is the first time in months I’ve been in your home. Aren’t you afraid of the gossip? Or is this you trying to let go a little?”

Taysia smiled. “Honestly, all I could think of was having an honest discussion away from prying eyes and ears. I had a heart-to-heart with myself this morning and came to terms with the fact that we are definitely outed as a couple. There’s no escaping the gossip. So I guess it was me letting go a little. I know, if I’m with a Murdock, that gossip comes with the territory. I’m not ashamed of you Ryan. Not in any way shape or form. And I’m sorry I ever made you think that.”

“So … now that we are officially a couple, maybe you could just move in with me and Tyler.”

Taysia almost had a heart attack. “Ryan…” she started.

“Well shit, I know that tone,” he said interrupting her. “You’re going to say no.”

“Ryan, please. One step at a time. This is you jumping ahead without thinking it through. I can’t move in, but it doesn’t mean we are hiding. I’m just not ready for that step. Give me some time.”

“Taysia,” he said softly, “That’s where you’re wrong. I think about you every night and every day. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You’re good for me and Tyler. I want to wake up with you by my side and hold you when I go to sleep. Perhaps we should just get married instead.”

Taysia wanted to pull her hair out. “Ryan … listen to me – please.  I said one step at a time. That doesn’t mean rushing into marriage either. We need to see how this works first.”

“I won’t say I’m sorry Taysia. I’m not. I want you in my life everyday. We’re in love. Isn’t that enough? I love being with you. Making you smile. It makes me happy to see you smile. And when it’s for me, or because of me, I’m on top of the world.”

Taysia couldn’t help the smile that slowly covered her face. Ryan loved her. He had his insecurities too. And that was okay. He’d been hurt. And she was afraid of jumping into uncharted territory and losing control.  She was so glad she called him.  She felt the same way when he was smiling, it made her feel warm all over. He really was a good man. Anyone who thought different was crazy. And he was hers. But still …

“Is that a yes?” he asked.

Taysia shook her head. “Ryan, you are incorrigible. That’s very sweet and flattering. You can ask me again later, I’m just not ready to say yes to a proposal on the heels of just discovering how you really feel. It’s too impulsive. So can we slow it down a little?”

“Okay, a compromise,” said Ryan smirking, “I’ll take back my proposal … for now … provided you let me stay a little longer.”

Taysia couldn’t help but grin expectantly. “Was that a compromise or a proposition?” she asked, “Because I’m all for you staying a lot longer. I have a few months of abstinence to make up for.”  She almost felt afraid as Ryan rose from his chair and came over to her. The look in his eye was almost predatory.

Ryan pulled her from the chair and kissed her softly. Soft was not what she was expecting, but still, it sent chills of desire throughout her body.

“I don’t give a damn what you call it,” he whispered as he pulled her close, “as long as I get to stay.”  He kissed her again, but this time his kiss was deep and sensual – needy and hungry – for her.  

As she melted into his kiss, she knew she’d been twice blessed. Once as a child with a teacher that took an interest in her and helped her find her true potential. And now, as an adult, with Ryan, a man that gave his love to her with a passion she never thought possible. He filled her up and made her whole, chasing away the last pieces of doubt she harbored about herself.  She loved him so very much. 

*****************************************************************************

Three months later…..

Tyler was thoroughly immersed in the game with his online friends when he heard someone pounding on his bedroom door.  It could only be his dad.  “Damn, I gotta go. Something came up,” he said through the headset and disconnected.

“What?” he called out impatiently. He wanted to get back in the game.

The door opened and his dad walked in. “I need to ask you something. It’s important.”

Tyler rolled his eyes. “I already did my homework,” he said.  His dad always asked him that.

“I’m glad you did, but that’s not what I wanted to talk about,” he said.

His dad sat down on the couch in his room so he turned his chair around to face him. “What then?” he asked, now curious.

“You know Dr. Fields and I have been dating for over a year now, right?” said his father.

“Yeah. So…” replied Tyler, wondering where this was going. Things had actually been pretty good since his dad had been with her. He seemed happier. And she always helped him with his class work at home so nobody knew he had a hard time understanding and had to go to a counselor. Then he started to panic a little.  Maybe they were breaking up. Now what would he do?  He could feel his heart rate start to speed up.

“Well, how would you feel if we got married?” asked his dad.

“You aren’t breaking up?” asked Tyler wanting to be sure he understood.

“No. Of course not. What makes you think that?” His dad looked worried.

“Nothing,” he said, feeling embarrassed, “it’s just when you wanted to talk about her …”

His father began to laugh making him feel stupid for thinking it might be bad. “A chip off the old block, always assuming the worst,” he said.  “No Tyler, I’m in love with her. I only wanted to make sure you were okay if I asked her to marry me, because really, she’d be marrying us. We’re a package deal. And if you’re not okay with it, then I won’t ask her.”

“She’d live here?” asked Tyler, hoping he’d say yes and they didn’t have to move.

“Yep, if that’s okay.  Why? Did you want her to live somewhere else?”

“No,” he said quickly. “Here is good.”

“Perfect. Then here’s the plan ….” said his father and proceeded to tell him how he wanted both of them to propose to her together.

“What if she says no,” worried Tyler, “can’t we just keep things like they are?”

His father looked sad. “She won’t say no Ty, she loves us both. And if she does say no, we’ll just have to work harder to make her see that she belongs with us.”

“I don’t think I want to do that. It’s too weird, you can ask her by yourself.”

“Okay. Great!  Then, I’m going to ask her tonight. Can I tell her you’re okay with it?”

Tyler nodded his head. “I hope she says yes Dad,” he said and truly meant it. He didn’t want to see his father sad anymore.

“She will. I know she will. After all, how could she say no to two awesome dudes like us?”

“Whatever Dad,” he said, “Oh, and good luck. Do I have to go to Aunt Rea’s?”

“Well, I don’t think Jack’s folks are home. Sorry son.”

“I’m almost fourteen.  I’m old enough to stay by myself.  Please.”

“I suppose, but you call me if anything happens and I’ll call and let you know if we’re getting married.”

Tyler finally relaxed. “Thanks Dad!”

“You’ve earned it,” said his dad and pulled him into a hug before he left Tyler’s room.

*****************************************************************

Later that night….

Ryan looked at Taysia sitting across the table. She was stunning tonight. But he was a little nervous. Tyler’s comments planted seeds of doubt. She very well could say no to his proposal, and her saying no wasn’t something he could change, at least not right away.

He’d waited like she asked and thought about it. He knew without a doubt he wanted Taysia in his life. Tyler had blossomed under her tutelage and was no longer struggling as much in school.

Tonight he ordered champagne instead of wine to accompany their meal.  He wanted it to be special.

They talked and laughed, enjoying their meal.  And all the while, he simply couldn’t stop looking at her.

“I think I’ll have the Tiramisu,” said Taysia when the meal was finished and Ryan began to laugh. When she asked him why, he told her his grandfather’s love story.

When they both finally stopped laughing, he said, “I find it a nice coincidence that we are having tiramisu tonight, of all nights.”

“Why?” she asked, “What’s different about tonight?”

“It’s the night you’re going to agree to marry me and Tyler,” he said grinning as he pulled the ring out of his pocket and put it on the table.

He pushed it towards her. “Taysia, will you marry me?” he asked and searched her eyes for the answer.

She sat there speechless for a minute with her hand covering her mouth and tears began to leak out.

Ryan couldn’t wait any longer. He was dying a slow death. “Baby, I’m not so good with mental telepathy. At least use sign language. Nod your head for yes, please baby.”

Finally she took a breath and nodded at the same time ‘Yes, yes, yes,’ came tumbling out of her mouth.

Ryan was overcome with joy. He grabbed the ring from the table and up got up.  He knelt in front of her and slid it on her finger. He kissed her hand and instead of letting go he stood up pulling her up with him.

He didn’t intend to make a spectacle of themselves, but he couldn’t help but kiss her.  He hadn’t felt this happy in years.  Not since his children were born. 

Everyone in the room started to clap. Crap, now he was in trouble. “I’m sorry,” he whispered in her ear.

Taysia laid her head on his shoulder and sighed. “Don’t be. I want the world to know you’re mine. I love you, Ryan Murdock, you’ve made me happier than I ever dreamed possible. Take me home now, I think I’ll have my tiramisu to go.”

Go to Chapter 4.12>>>>>>

Go back to Chapter 4.10

44 thoughts on “Chapter 4.11 – Compromises

  1. Pingback: Chapter 4.10 – Double Edged Sword | New Beginnings

  2. Argh – why did you do that? I was so not gonna ship this. Well, I guess she is not THE principal anymore, just A principal so who cares? But that was a fast proposal initially. I know this is slowly fading into the next gen but despite of it all, I don’t think I am ready to let go of Ryan now and I also want to see what a marriage between an uptight control freak and an impulsive guy who rarely thinks things through is gonna look! Hopefully Taysia can keep him under control and hopefully Ryan found his true love without much drama at last.
    We all can already smell that the drama for Ryan is about to come from a different direction (->Ty). He is cute as a teen! All daddy. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Yay they’re getting married! WOOT! And I bet they have a baby (or two) who will be gorgeous. And even though there won’t be a next gen, I do hope we get to see what they look like. 😉

    So now Tyler can be happy with a stepmom who will outshine his own mom. It’s kind of sad but his real mom will be like an aunt to him where they barely see each other or have a relationship. But I’m glad Taysia will be there for him! Cute fam!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes! I hope marriage number 2 goes better for Ryan. And she’s still plenty young to have a baby. I’m sure if she wants one, he’d be willing and you know it would be gorgeous.

      Taysia will be good for Tyler. ❤️. It is sad his real mom doesn’t seem to really care that much. She is more like a distant Aunt than his mother. I’m sure she loves him in her weird way. But she feels he’s well taken care of by Ryan and she’s too busy making sure Samantha is a star that she just lets Ryan do whatever he wants with him. 💔

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  4. Wooh! The rollercoaster ride came to an end without bursting into flames and flying off the rails! 😂❤️

    I’m so glad that both Ryan and Tyler are finally gonna have some stability and positivity in their lives! They’ve definitely earned it after everything they’ve been through. Thank goodness for Taysia!

    Hoping we will have some adorable Rysia babies in the future 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yes! It teetered on the edge for a little before it rolled in for a smoothish landing. 😂😂😂 🎢

      Those boys both need the stability and positivity that Taysia brings. She obviously knows how to handle Tyler without losing her cool unlike someone else. 🙄. She came along at the right time. There could possibly be a Rysia babe in the future. 🥰

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  5. Here’s the thing I keep wondering about. This moment in a relationship. The declaration of love. I’ve noticed it in other stories and movies. There’s a time before and time after two people say ‘I love you’ to each other. It’s like anything before that doesn’t count as love. And everything is well and perfect all of a sudden after those words are spoken. You see, I don’t like this concept, because it’s absurd. Ryan told Taysia she means the world to him. If that isn’t the declaration of love, then I have no idea what is. But alas, he didn’t say it in Those Words! Is there an official guide somewhere or Bible for lovers where it is stated that love must be declared by those exact words to be believable? Because people seem to be acting like it is so. How can you not see a person is in love with you when they say ‘You mean the world to me’? When their actions speak loudly enough about how deeply they care about you? How can you mistake that for gratefulness? I actually believe it is more creative to find other ways to express love than overuse the ‘I love you’ phrase. Cookie points for Ryan for saying it his own way. Zero points for Taysia for having eyes and ears but not really using them.
    Kay. I’m done here today. Bai.

    Liked by 3 people

    • It’s so true! Those three words seem to be in some official guide somewhere and must be said for it to be so. You certainly can show and express your love of another person without those words. And sometimes they are said and it means nothing. And is manipulative. So yes, actions speak louder than words.

      I’m glad Ryan got Cookie points! 🍪🍪🍪. He’s such a lummox that sometimes I wonder about him. But I think he’s finally maturing a bit. Taysia is a lot younger and hasn’t really been in many relationships before him. So naturally I think she second guessed everything. Put her with the kids, she’s good, but out of a classroom, she’s out of her comfort zone.
      Bai! ❤️

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  6. I don’t think there’s much to be said, asides from what there has been already said. I’m glad they worked things out, and thought I wanted for Ryan to learn not to bring the wedding cake in the first wedding, I’m glad that he and Taysia decided to tight the knot. Good for then!

    I still think they’ll have some troubles in the future. Maybe related to Maribel? I mean, yeah she most likely couldn’t care less if her ex has a new wife, but they might still meet in some Family reunion or other. I mean, from what I take, Ryan and Tyler still got out to visit Maribel and Samantha, so Taysia is bound to meet Ryan’s ex and his dautgher.

    I also wonder how the kids will feel about this. I mean, everything should be okey-dokey for Tyler until they have their first baby. Not only will there be some major age gap between then (Tyler is what, 14? 13? By the time the child is like 7, Tyler should be out of his parent’s house.), but he also might find himself as the son of ”the failed marriage”, mimicking his father’s logic when he was also a teen, beliving his father and mother figure love more the child that came from both of them.

    Maribel might further Samantha’s dislike when it comes to her father, since Bel could say Ryan is ”replacing them” with his new, younger wife. Speaking of Young, I truly wonder what Dr.Fields will do now. My bet is, she isn’t going to be a principal for long, so maybe she’ll help Ryan out in the gym? Like, I dunno, in some human resources area? lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • Not much except they are two opposites, but at least they recognize it going in. So maybe Ryan will calm down a little and she’ll let loose a little.

      They may have some troubles with Maribel… we shall see. She could chew up Taysia and spit her out! And she might try to poison Sam’s opinion of her.

      Tyler will probably be okay, but a baby could change that! You’re right. Tyler is 13 in this chapter. He could totally feel left out. Because their child will need attention. And it would be Taysia’s first baby.

      Her leaving the school to help in the gym could happen, especially after a baby comes along…. so much could happen….

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  7. They make a cute couple. All the Murdock men are hot, yummy, delicious. The women look okay, too.
    What happen to Archer? I know he went to Europe. I would like to hear how story.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, it was Germany he went to. I hope she is a in your face, kick your a$$ type of girl. That’s the type he needs. The girl that looks and acts sweet and innocent and can take him out if need be. 😂

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  8. So Taysia has been helping Tyler privately at home. And being very successful at it too. Just one observation. Tyler needs to learn to be proactive, it will help him later as an adult and he may not have Dr Fields helping him out for the rest of his life.
    It was a good chapter, showing the importance and a good example of working out their differences. Something every couple needs to learn. There are not enough good examples in most peoples lives.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Tyler needed help badly and it’s probably even better that she’s doing it at his home. It helps him feel like he fits in better at school since he isn’t going to special classes. And he doesn’t want to disappoint her. As far as being proactive, we’ll I hope that comes with maturity. Right now he certainly is very reactive.

      Compromise is something every couple has to deal with and accept. I’m very glad that Ryan and Taysia are being open and honest about it. With the knowledge that it won’t always be easy. There will be bumps in the road but they can weather them by supporting each other.

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  9. Hello! Sorry I took forever to reply, this was a great chapter! She said yes! 😀💍 yippie!

    I’ve gotten to like Taysia more and more, and I’m glad things are finally falling into place for she and Ryan. It’s great Ty is happy too! Looking forward to seeing pretty wedding pics of them!

    I wonder how Rae and her lovely family are doing? How is Greyson? Did he get his crush? The twins? Would love to see them too!

    Looking forward to the next chapter, Audrey! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yay. I really think Taysia will be good for Ryan and Tyler too. She has what he lacks and he has what she lacks. They sort of fit together. In my mind I see the yen and yang symbols.

      The will be the few obligatory wedding pics. Have to have those but it will be from Tyler’s point of view. We are finally moving on. So we will get to see all of the kiddos, most of them teenagers now, at the wedding. Crammed into Ben’s home. And a little piece with poor old Ben talking to his great grandson. Trying to impart some wisdom and sneak a piece of cake. ❤️ 🍰 Oops. Spoiler. Lol.

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  10. Pingback: Chapter 4.12 – Left Out | New Beginnings

  11. I’m here!! I am sooo sorry for being so late (and for saying that too often lately)! 😦
    I am so happy for those two!! I’ll admit both of them got on my nerves for different reasons along the way, but awww…. they definitely deserve to be happy together! Ryan especially has been through too much!
    I was just about to note that Tyler reminds me so much of Cole, but I see Louise beat me to it! Those big bright blue eyes!
    I loooved this chapter! *proceeds to read the next one* ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi! Nice to see you whenever you have time! 😚 They got on my nerves too! Lol. But I think they finally got where they needed to. Ryan loves her and she just needed to go slower than he wanted. Ryan does have a lot Cole vibes going on with those big blue eyes. The Murdock genes are strong. Glad you enjoyed this one.

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  12. Wow okay. I didn’t expect to hit the nail on the head in my last comment.

    It’s so painful to read from Taysia’s perspective because she has such a low opinion of herself and puts herself down so much! My gosh! It’s ‘her fault’ when Ryan’s angry, it’s ‘her feelings’ that are selfish and unfounded, ‘she’ is the control freak, she’s surprised Ryan hasn’t dumped ‘her’. Wow.. She justifies Ryan’s emotions and actions every step of the way while chiding herself throughout. And then the irony when Ryan became mad and says she’s trying to justify herself lol.

    Buuut now I see it! Ryan has ADHD, doesn’t he? The impulsivity, black-and-white thinking, jumping to conclusions, living in the moment. Tyler had it so I’m assuming he got it from Ryan then? That explains why she’s so patient with Ryan, she probably detected his trait.

    I don’t know if you’re going to do Taysia’s background, but my prediction is that Taysia has had quite a controversial upbringing, or at least had had something controversial happen to her. Her self-introspective, to the point of being self-critical, and self-censure, her justifications for everything Ryan does, yet doesn’t stand up for herself, or feels guilty after standing up for herself, points to quite a few things but at the moment I’m thinking of the worse one so I’m going to withhold to saying anything specific haha!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hah! Ryan, he’s totally ADHD. She does sense his impulsivity for sure. Taysia had to work hard extremely hard to get where she is. To the exclusion of everything else in her life. Her job was her life. And yes, she justifies his actions but at least she didn’t let him bulldoze over her either, even at the risk of making him angry. Which doesn’t take much with Ryan.

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